Whether you accidentally bump into them in Asda while you’re in your ‘relaxing’ joggers whilst struggling with your phone, trolley and big shop, or you have arranged a meal in a restaurant (with a calm cool vibe to keep everyone happy), meeting your significant other’s parents for the first time can be both daunting and momentous. For some, whether your Mum can tolerate your partner’s occasional swearing or whether your Dad will be able to cope with their horrendous football supporting choice can be the deal breaker for a relationship. For some people out there, if the two loves in their lives do not connect – meeting the parents can be a complete disaster.
So, here are my 11 ways to smash meeting the parents for the first time.
1. Choose a good place to meet
You need to make sure that everyone is comfortable. For a first meeting that is likely to be awkward at first, choosing somewhere that doesn’t suit all parties is a bad idea. Personally, I think a good first meeting place is a café or restaurant. When enjoying a meal or coffee together it is easy to find topics to discuss – the food, environment, similar places you’ve been to. Once you have all settled in and got over the initial awkwardness, conversation should begin to flow.
2. Wear something you feel comfortable in
Like with a first date, there are bound to be endless deliberations about what to wear to give the best impression to your partner’s parents. Although it’s important to look at least presentable, if you end up wearing your smartest dress that you only wear for funerals and job interviews, you are bound to feel uncomfortable and under-confident. It’s a much better idea to wear your NORMAL CLOTHES, then at least you will be portraying a part of your real personality.
3. Don’t swear
Seems like it’s stating the obvious, but swearing is a big no-no. Be respectful. Speaking of which…
4. DON’T MENTION SEX.
The last thing your new boyfriend’s Mum needs to know is how he enjoys eating you out more than his favourite meat feast stuffed crust pizza (with a garlic bread side). Another related suggestion would be to tone down the PDA. Although it would be a problem if you are all over each other, a hand hold or a kiss on the cheek will show them that you aren’t a heartless individual.
5. Bring a gift.
Parents like thoughtful actions, and turning up with a potted plant and a tin of cheese crackers is bound to put a smile on anyone’s face.
6. Don’t criticise your partner in front of them
Don’t diss their little darling – they are the golden child, remember?
7. Big yourself up (but don’t lie)
Make sure you let them know you are good enough for their child. Chances are, if you are at the meeting-the-parents stage your relationship is going quite well, but don’t sell yourself short – make sure they know you are a good, honest human being.
8. Be chatty and confident
Although it’s easy to be shy and retiring in such a situation, you will come across better if you are able to engage in polite, adult conversation. This makes you appear possibly more intelligent than you are, and would also reduce the potential awkward silences.
9. But don’t overdo it
No one likes an over-talker, make sure the others can get a word in edge-ways.
10. Talk about your significant other
Parents love to brag about their kids. If you join in they will be in their element – happy parents = successful meeting.
Areas of inclusion should usually be things like their likes and dislikes, their skills. Maybe even tell the parents your favourite things about your partner – it’s important to both show how well you know them as well as how important they are to you.
11. JUST RELAX
At the end of the day, you probably did your best. If they STILL don’t like you after you’ve worn your best conservative sweater, kept up with pronouncing all your H’s correctly and talked endlessly about your desire to protect and care for the environment– they probably aren’t worth your worrying.
